Are they “cloaking” you? This is the toxic phenomenon that goes beyond “ghosting”
The explosion of social networks and dating applications have favored friendly and loving encounters. Its use has brought positive consequences (immediacy, access to a greater number of people…) but also negative consequences, directly related to emotional responsibility.
In this sense, several experts warned about the extension of phenomena such as ghosting (stopping giving news to a person with whom we were beginning to maintain a relationship) or negating (make “compliments” that, in reality, hide an insult, intended to sweep away a person’s confidence and make them feel inferior).
One of them is especially noted for his cruel character. Its about cloaking. Discover what it is and how to deal with it.
What does the cloaking?
Coined by Rachel Thompson, the term (based on the word “cloack” which means “cloak”) refers to a phenomenon even more extreme than the ghosting: in addition to stopping showing signs of life, the person blocks the other from all possible channels, like networks. The goal is clear: you will not have to answer for your behavior.
The phenomenon, widely analyzed by experts, denotes a lack of maturity and empathy: the person prefers to avoid conflict, with an underlying form of cowardice. At no time are the repercussions that his behavior may have on the affected person raised.
How to deal with it?
In its latest trend report, Bumble, the dating app where women make the first move, highlights a key shift in the perception of relationships: “With the return of office culture and busy social schedules, most People are feeling overwhelmed right now. This has forced us to prioritize our red and green flags and more than half (52%) have set even more boundaries in the last year. This includes being clearer about our emotional needs (63%)being more thoughtful and intentional about how we put ourselves out there (59%), and not overcommitting socially (53%).”
Some encouraging data that shows that more and more people are aware of the limits. In any case, if you have doubts about your own behavior, it is important to be honest: “You know you are being emotionally responsible if you feel that you are true to yourself and with the other, if you build relationships from transparency, with frequent and assertive communication and not passive-aggressive. A communication based on agreements and mutual respect,” explains psychologist Eva Álvarez, mentioned by the Freeda platform.
If you think you are suffering from it, remember the importance of loving and valuing yourself: “love begins with oneself and rises to others. Self-care and self-compassion are fundamental elements to start loving ourselves. “We must not fall into the mistake of thinking that having self-love is the same as being narcissistic.”it states Alejandra Sánchez, teacher of Deusto Health of Mindfulness. Nothing justifies this person adopting this behavior. It is, therefore, essential that you remember that you are not to blame.
If the situation overcomes you, do not hesitate to go to a professional to analyze the situation and your emotional needs.
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